Tired Of Pretending? Tips To Beat Mainstream Content Shaming With Confidence

The latest pop culture beat is no longer just about personal palettes. It’s social currency in a rapidly digitized world. The craze of watching a film first day first show or disrupting your sleep pattern to catch an international series the moment its released are no new phenomenon for a status-obsessed generation. Binge watching is the new trend of the town and differing opinions are no longer heard out in a rapidly polarized environment. In such a complex scenario, how does one fight the urge to disagree with a popular cultural opinion? How does one get over the shame associated with missing out on the “classics”?

Here's a look at how to battle mainstream content shaming in your own flair and fashion:

Develop a strong sense of self: Research suggests that most cases of cultural FOMO arise out of an inherent lack of satisfaction with one’s own life. “People who are more confident, less reliant on external validation, or have had supportive environments growing up may find it easier to stand their ground. On the other hand, individuals who fear rejection or have been conditioned to “fit in” may struggle to express a different view, especially in public settings,” says Shruti Shah, Chief Psychologist and Founder of Holistic Mind Therapy. In order to overcome the urge to feel accepted, it’s important to develop a stronger sense of confidence and self-esteem in your own individual persona. “When people develop a strong sense of self—through therapy, introspection, or mindful living—they begin to prioritise alignment over approval,” adds Shruti.

Understand your motivations: Oftentimes, our motivations for favoring an opinion are based not out of what we think but what we believe is the ideal and more acceptable way of thinking. As Shruti shares, “It begins with self-awareness and emotional regulation. When we know why we believe in something, and are emotionally grounded, it’s easier to respond with calm conviction rather than defensiveness or withdrawal. I often encourage clients to ask themselves: Is this belief rooted in my values, or in a need to please others?” When you start making opinions based on personal gratification rather than social acceptance, you will ultimately end up removing the inherent sense of cognitive dissonance that arises out of falling in line with pre-set notions.

Likes and dislikes: Take a pen and paper and list down the things you like and dislike. What you feel about situations in real life will accurately mirror what you expect to see on the silver screen as well. Neil Dmello, a mass communication graduate student at St Xavier’s College and avid film enthusiast, takes the courage to share a controversial opinion because of the clarity he enjoys in understanding his personal inclinations. “I actually liked the film ‘Gehraiyaan’ but due to the intimate scenes people labelled it as “soft porn” and no one really spoke of the characters and how it was more of a thriller rather than a romantic drama,” he reveals. Being clear on your chart of personal preferences will help you understand and analyse the specific bits of a film that appeal or dismay you and hence provide the confidence required to vocalise your thoughts better.

Look beyond your circle: Social media often has the damning effect of creating an echo chamber of multiplying opinions. Unfortunately, algorithms are designed in a way to only help re-affirm our existing beliefs, making us completely oblivious to the existence of any contrary opinions. As Shruti shares, “Social media platforms reward strong reactions—likes, shares, and engagement go up when opinions are polarised. This can make nuanced or moderate views feel “boring” or invisible.” In such instances, rely on other in-person mediums as well to share your closely guarded thoughts about the latest release and you may just find a friend or two who is sailing in the same boat as you but simply never chose to speak out on a public platform.

Set boundaries: Setting boundaries in terms of social media use can help detoxify your life to a large extent. Look beyond the screen to find solace in real people who are able to hear and bear a more diverse set of opinions. Attend discussion clubs or associate with someone who shares interests common to you. As Neil shares, “Most of the time I keep my opinions to myself or maybe I tell it to a close friend to whom I can actually explain my opinion. Usually when you are going against a popular public opinion, people tend to assume you are doing it just to stand out.” While doing this, the task of being more open-minded becomes a narrow two-way street for you will only gain as much acceptance as you give back.

Beat cultural FOMO and revel in your personal opinions about pop culture bits that you truly enjoy.

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