Khitaaiyo Vivah redefines gender justice

As the recent Jodidara Vivah (polyandry marriage) in Shillai village continues to spark national conversations, another equally powerful tradition from Himachal Pradesh’s Trans-Giri area is now drawing attention — one that redefines how women’s autonomy and dignity can be upheld within the framework of age-old customs.

This tradition is known as Khitaaiyo Vivah, a practice followed by the Scheduled Tribe Hattee community, where a married woman is fully empowered to end her marriage and remarry — without any social stigma or coercion. Far from being a taboo, the practice is respected, formally conducted and accepted by the community at large. In a society where marital independence for women is still a subject of struggle, the Hattee tribe’s quiet but powerful customs stand as a glowing example of indigenous gender justice.

Under Khitaaiyo Vivah, once a woman finally decides to leave her first marriage, it is the new groom’s family that must approach her home with a marriage proposal. If woman agree to marry new groom, her family then visits the groom’s home as Khitaru (social representatives), and a symbolic settlement amount — kheet — is offered by the new groom to the woman’s former husband. This is not a transactional exchange, but a culturally respectful process that formalises her choice with complete social legitimacy.

Just days ago, the Hattee community made national headlines when two brothers of Shillai village—Pradeep and Kapil Negi—jointly married Sunita Chauhan of Kunhat village in a Jodidara Vivah. The ceremony was conducted openly and proudly in front of relatives and community elders, proving that such customs are not hidden practices but living traditions celebrated with consensus and dignity.

Now, Khitaaiyo Vivah adds another layer to this story—revealing that in the heart of the Himalayas, a tribal society has been quietly practising what much of the world is still advocating: the right of a woman to choose her own path.

“In our community, women are never pressured—they decide for themselves,” says Nirmla Devi, a resident of Shillai Tehsil. “Whether it is choosing a husband, leaving a marriage, or managing a family, a woman is always at the centre. We call her Siyani, the wise one.”

In Hattee households, the Siyani is more than a homemaker—she is often the de facto head of the family. In both Khitaaiyo and Jodidara marriages, her will is paramount, her choices final and her respect unquestioned.

Community spokesperson Suresh Singta adds, “These are not customs of backwardness, but systems of balance. In our traditions, dignity comes first — and that begins with respecting women’s decisions.”

While Khitaaiyo Vivah is no longer a common practice in the modern-day Trans-Giri area, it still quietly exists within the traditional fabric of the Hattee community as a dignified option for women — especially when there remains no way to continue with the existing marriage.

At a time when national discussions around women’s rights, gender equality, and marital freedom are gaining momentum, the Hattee community’s living customs offer a powerful reminder that progressive values need not be borrowed from outside — they can be born from within.

In the villages of Himachal’s Trans-Giri area, tradition and women’s empowerment do not exist in opposition. Here, they walk hand in hand — carved into the culture, upheld by generations and still lighting the way forward.

Himachal Tribune