After Losing Her Father, This 22-YO Turned Her Grief Into a Lifeline for Others on Instagram

On 28 February 2022, life changed forever for 19-year-old Sagaya Angelin Shalini. What began as an ordinary trip to her hostel turned into a nightmare when she witnessed the most painful moment of her life — losing her father before her eyes. Left to cope with the immense loss, she turned to Instagram, not just to share her grief but to heal — both herself and others. 

What started as a personal outlet to express her sorrow gradually transformed into something much bigger. Through sharing her journey of loss and healing, Sagaya found not just her own strength but also a purpose: to become a source of comfort for others who were struggling. 

Today, she has built a community rooted in compassion and support, helping over 100 people across Tamil Nadu cope with their own battles, offering financial assistance, emotional encouragement, and a reminder that even in the depths of pain, kindness can bloom.

Seed of helping sown early

Growing up in Chennai, Shalini (22) was raised in a middle-class family that placed a strong emphasis on compassion and community service. Her family had a tradition of celebrating birthdays and anniversaries by visiting orphanages and old-age homes, where they would share meals and spend meaningful time with the residents. “We used to spend quality time with them after providing food,” adds Shalini.

Slowly developing an interest in community work, Shalini started volunteering at Jeeva Ratchanai in 2021 while pursuing her bachelor’s in civil engineering. “I started working part-time as a content writer to earn and help the children as well,” shares Shalini, whose first salary was Rs 5000.

Shalini used to visit the orphanage often, talk to the kids, understand their needs, and help them in whatever financial capacity she could. “Spending time with the kids, I could see that while their basic amenities like food were given, I sensed something was missing in them, and that was love,” recalls Shalini, which pushed her to be kind and provide her support.

But one life-altering incident changed everything for Shalini and has created the person she is today.

‘Life brought us down – financially and emotionally’

In 2022, Shalini’s world was torn apart in an unimaginable way. While travelling to her hostel with her father, they were involved in a tragic accident. In that instant, Shalini watched her father’s life slip away before her eyes.

“In 2022, my father and I were travelling to my hostel when we met with an accident, and I tragically lost him,” Shalini shares, her voice trembling with the weight of the memory.

The impact of that moment was overwhelming, a blur of disbelief and heartache. “I did not go near my dad because I knew that he was no more, and I did not want to confirm it further,” she adds, as if keeping a distance from the truth was the only way to protect herself from fully accepting it.

Standing there, in her bloodstained clothes, Shalini begged for help. For what felt like an eternity, she was alone on that road, surrounded by people who seemed more interested in her pain than in offering assistance.

“While a few people came and asked me what had happened, most of them were taking videos of me crying on the road, and that created a huge impact,” Shalini recalls, the cruelty of being reduced to a spectacle searing into her heart.

In the aftermath of her father’s death, Shalini made a heart-wrenching choice — one that no daughter should ever have to make. She decided not to let her mother see her father’s body, knowing that the shock might destroy her. “I knew she wouldn’t be able to survive the trauma for the rest of her life,” she says.

As the oldest, Shalini was forced to take on responsibilities far beyond her years. She had to break the devastating news to her mother and sister, give her statement to the authorities, and face the painful, unbearable task of collecting her father’s body.

It was all too much for a 19-year-old girl.

“I was not less mature to not know what was happening, nor too mature to understand that this is a part of life,” Shalini says. “I was perfectly mature for my age. Life brought us down financially, mentally, and emotionally, and I did not understand how to live life on my own.” The weight of the world had suddenly been placed on her shoulders, and she had no idea how to bear it.

For two months, Shalini could barely face the world outside. But when she finally did venture out, she sought the comfort of a place that had become like a second home — the children’s home where she had been volunteering for years. There, the children had become her family, their bond forged through countless moments of shared laughter, learning, and trust.

The moment Shalini walked through the door, something unexpected happened. The children, with their innocent hearts and boundless warmth, gathered around her.

“As soon as I entered, all the children came together, and they said, ‘Akka, from now on, dad will be with you through us,’” Shalini recalls, her voice quivering with emotion. In that moment, surrounded by their pure love, Shalini realised the deep impact she had unknowingly made on their lives.

“I realised that I’ve shown them love brightly, and they can reciprocate it back to me,” she shares. It was in their innocence and their capacity for unconditional love that Shalini found a sense of purpose again, one that would help her channel her grief into something healing — not just for her, but for them too.

This moment became a turning point, helping Shalini move forward, even if only a step at a time, as she learned to channel her pain into giving back, finding solace in the light of those who needed it most.

Using the power of Instagram to help others

Long before Shalini ever thought about using social media for a greater cause, she had already been living a life rooted in service, volunteering at children’s homes and old age homes, offering her time and love to those who needed it most. After her father’s death, these acts of kindness became even more personal, helping her cope with her own grief.

 “Through my part-time gig, I came to know that influencers get paid a lot for brand collaborations,” she says. It sparked an idea — could she use Instagram, not just for herself, but as a platform to generate funds and continue her mission of helping others? Initially, she started posting general content to build a following.

What started as an attempt to build a base with unrelated content took a life-changing turn when she shared a deeply personal video. “One day, I posted a video about the accident and how rude the world was to me at that time,” she adds.

“I realised people fail to understand kindness, so I decided to show people how to love,” Shalini shares. From that moment, her vision for Instagram changed. Beyond raising money for those in need, she was determined to create a community of kindness — a safe, healing space where people could find understanding, support, and hope. 

Vijayabharathi V (18), who lost her mother when she was in class six, used to save the first slice of her birthday cake for her late mother. “Last year, when I celebrated my birthday, I cut the first piece of cake and gave it to Shalini, saying, ‘This is for you, Amma.’ That’s the impact that she has created in my life,” shares Vijayabharathi.

Shalini’s approach to helping others is deeply personal. In the early days, she would meet people during her travels, listen to their stories and understand their struggles. As her work gained recognition, people began reaching out to her through messages and emails. 

“I get a lot of messages, and my intuition guides me in selecting the people. And because I have been doing this for a while, we can identify based on the message if they are being genuine,” says Shalini.

She spends a month researching before offering support, ensuring she never makes promises she cannot fulfill. “I think twice before agreeing to sponsor an individual’s education because I don’t want to give false promises and break their heart.” 

Shalini helps people by providing the financial support they need for their education, setting up a small business, following their passion, etc, for which she raises funds via social media. “Sometimes, I just help them to buy their monthly groceries, stationery, and the essentials, based on what they need,” she adds.

Despite her best efforts, financial limitations sometimes prevent her from helping everyone. “People have asked for sponsorships for engineering colleges, but right now, I am not that financially capable. The only help I can give is to raise funds among my Instagram followers,” shares Shalini.

With the money, Shalini has sponsored the education of 10 students studying arts, engineering and law and has helped 10 people set up their small businesses. She has also been fortunate to impact over 100 lives since 2023.

Love — What everyone craves for

For Shalini, giving goes beyond money. She believes in providing love and emotional support, which, for many, has been life-changing. “I don’t help people only financially, I always pack it with a lot of love. I decided to show the people that I have changed and have become kind. It is the viewer’s wish to decide if they need to become a better person or not.” 

One girl, hesitant to burden her grandparents with the cost of a simple accounts book, reached out to Shalini. A conversation was all it took to make the girl feel seen and valued, and today, she calls Shalini Amma (mother in Tamil). “She has been through a lot. She said that if I hadn’t called that day, she would not be alive now.” 

Barakath Asmi, an 18-year-old from a village in Thenkasi, shares how she was about to stop her education due to financial struggle. “My dad passed away when I was in class eight, and with that, I lost my confidence and mental peace. Shalini Akka (sister in Tamil)  has given me happiness back and the ability to be bold because I know that she has my back,” shares Asmi

“Nobody has taken the amount of effort that Shalini has done for me. She takes care of my education, stays with me when I feel low and ensures that I have the courage to face things in life,” adds Vijayabharathi, who is now pursuing her bachelor’s in computer applications, sponsored by Shalini.

While this is a huge responsibility for Shalini, it is also making her a better person day by day. “It also allows me to be on the right track so they can follow me,” she shares with a smile.

‘I will never use their stories for content’

Shalini is determined to share people’s stories with dignity and authenticity, never using their struggles for reach. “Out of the 190 videos that I have posted, I have never sympathised with the person. Though I help them overcome their struggle, I‘m clear that I will never use them as content,” says Shalini, highlighting that a lot happened off-camera.

In a time when emotional videos often go viral, she refuses to exploit anyone’s pain for views. “While that was an easy way to make money, I would never choose that. It is for a simple reason that, if someone does the same to me, providing aid in the pretext of making content, I would never accept that,” she shares.

Instead, she focuses on the inspirational aspect of each journey, ensuring that the message remains pure. “When I take a video, I put myself in their shoes. This makes sure that I convey their journey in the purest sense. I always focus on the inspirational story behind every individual, and I am just using my platform to take it to a wider audience,” she adds, highlighting the responsibility that she holds.

Shalini personally connects with the people she helps, taking the time to research, write, and edit their stories herself. “I do have a team, but I know that nobody can love like me,” she shares with a smile.

She is not in a hurry to create content — each story is carefully crafted, with the person’s consent at every step. “I take a look at the video and ensure the message is conveyed well. I even sent it to the individual and asked if this was okay or if you wanted to add or remove a few information,” she explains.

For Shalini, it is never about numbers or reach but about staying true to the reason she started this journey. “When I start worrying about reach, I will stop focusing on why I started this in the first place.” 

Healing — a give-and-take process

Despite the emotional weight of her work, Shalini remains committed to her mission. “I am just trying to fill their emptiness with love,” she shares, while healing herself every single day through her social work.

She dreams of building a home for people — a safe space where those with or without caregivers can experience a sense of belonging. 

“Every girl has been through some form of physical abuse — be it big or small. This home will be a safe space for anybody, whether they have their caregivers or not. I want them to have a feeling of home here.” But she cannot do it alone. With more support, she could extend her reach, fund more education, and provide security to those who have nowhere else to go. 

If her story resonates with you, consider being a part of her journey, because even the smallest act of kindness can change a life.

Edited by Leila Badyari Castelino; All images courtesy Shalini Robert

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